... the exhaustion... the bonds you create with your fellow trainees... the drama... the way your skin gets thicker... the blunders... the procedures... the tears no one gets to see... the skills... your first needle stick injury... the chaos... the patient you publish into a case report... the miracles... the facial hair phase of my career... the tragedies... families who will love you forever... families who want to crucify you...
The precision... wearing scrubs (aka pajamas) on most days... eating, sleeping, and showering in the hospital... the confusion... the patient who thinks they're in love with you... the patient who blames you for everything... the youngest patient you've lost... the centenarian that never seems to die... being reprimanded for charting "condition at discharge: Alive, but without my permission."...
The patient you wish you'd never seen... the double Facepalm when the Fail is so strong, one Facepalm is not enough... losing your faith in humanity and having it restored... losing the love of your life... realizing that no one looks back on their life and remembers the nights they had plenty of sleep.
They say life is dramatically better as an Attending physician, we'll see about that.
As I look into the future, all I think about these days is October 31, 2015.
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